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I checked David's* room. He was gone. I quickly punched
the numbers on my cell phone, making certain that caller
ID was blocked, as he had taken to not answering calls
from us after sneaking out. David eventually told us
where he was, and we drove to get him. We could tell
he was stoned the minute he stepped into the car. But
this time was different—he admitted that he was,
and that he needed help.
We didn't know it, but we had been on a path to that
moment for three years. Our home life was filled with
suspicion and constant doubts. The school would call:
where was David? At night we'd check his room: no David.
Occasional calls from the police and trips to the emergency
room punctured our trust: was his version of events
true? We wanted to believe him, but the frequency with
which we choked down bizarre explanations had become
a matter of deep concern.
We constantly asked ourselves what we were doing wrong.
He was emotionally flat, unresponsive to our countless
attempts to surface his feelings. In fact, he didn't
seem to care about anything at all. He simply wasn't
the boy we had known before middle school.
We found out about ACS through a friend. At ACS, we
connected with families who were grappling with similar
circumstances. We saw that healing was possible and
that gave us new hope and strength to embark on the
long, hard road to recovery. It wasn't short . . . it
wasn't easy . . . it wasn't painless. But over many
months, the therapists at the Adolescent Substance Abuse
Treatment Program helped us unveil the issues underlying
David's substance abuse. David began to connect with
us again, and when he opened up to us, it felt like
it was the first time in a long time. We are now building
a relationship with our son based on honesty with ourselves
and each other.
Today, David understands that long-term recovery is
more than sobriety; it is the decision to make behavior
and lifestyle changes. Even as we face the inevitable
setbacks that occur along the way, his continued sobriety
and general forward progress keep us hopeful. Not everything
is perfect, but we are thankful that we have a son who
comes to us with his problems, goes to school, and tries
to do what is asked of him. Most significantly, we have
our child back: he's a son we can believe in, a son
we can be proud of, a son we can trust!
- Nancy,
David’s Mother
*Name changed to protect confidentiality
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